Enjoy Good Jokes(Sardi Special)
1. Sardi : You cheated me.
Shopkeeper: How ?
Sardi : You said this is American made radio. But when I put it ON, it says All India Radio.
2. Sardi got into a bus on 1st April when conductor asked for ticket. He gave Rs.10/- and took the ticket and said April fool. I have a pass.
3. Sardi joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer. Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.
Sardi : Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright.
4. On a romantic day sardi's girlfriend asks him. Darling on our engagement day will you give me a ring.
Sardi : Ya sure, from landline or mobile.
5. Doctor to patient : You will die within 2 hours. Do you want to see any one before you die?
Patient : Yes. A good doctor.
6. 2 sardis were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardi 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
sardi 2 : Dont worry, I have a one more.
7. Sardi was busy removing a wheel from his auto. A man asks sardi why are you removing a wheel from your auto.
sardi : Cant you read the board. Parking is only for 2 wheeler.
8. Sardi : What is the name of your car ?
Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with "T".
Sardi : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai. Hamaara gaadi petrol se start hoti hai.
9. Boss : Where were you born ?
sardi : Punjab.
Boss : which part ?
sardi : Kya which part ? Whole body born in punjab.
10. How will you destroy a submarine full of sardis?Simple. Just knock the door and they will open it.
11.Four guys,one each from Harvard, Yale, MIT university and SANTA from Punjab University were to be interviewed for a prestigious job.
One common question was asked to all 4 of them.
INTERVIEWER: WHICH IS THE FASTEST THING IN THE WORLD?
YALE guy: Its light, Nothing can travel faster than light.
HARVARD Guy: It's the Thought; b'cos thought is so fast it comes instantly in your mind.
MIT guy: Its Blink, you can blink and its hard to realize you blinked.
SANTA : Its Loose motion
INTERVIEWER: (Shocked to hear Santa's reply, asked) "WHY"?
SANTA : Last night after dinner, I was lying in my bed and I got the worst stomach cramps, and before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHTS, it was over!!!!
12.Sardar: I hav'nt slept all nite in the train.
Sardar: Got upper berth.
Friend: Y did'nt u Xchnged?
Sardar: oye, there was nobody 2 Xchng in the lower Berth..
13.Sardar tells a girl "Come 2 my house at night, nobody will b there............."
Girl goes at night & really nobody was there.
14.A SARDAR went 2 a BANK to open a S.B. A/C.
After seeing the Form He had gone to DELHI for filling up.
U know y?
FORM said " FILL UP IN CAPITAL ".
15.A sardar invested 2 Lakhs in a business and Suffered huge Loss.
Do u know what the business was?
. . . . . He opened a Saloon in Punjab!.
16.A Teacher lecturing on population - In India after Every 10 sec a women gives birth to a kid.
A Sardar stands up- we must find & stop her!.
17.Sardar-why r all these people running?
Man- This is a race, the winner will get the cup.
Sardar-If only the winner will get the cup, why r others running?
18.Sardar had twins; he named them Tin & Martin.
Again had twins & named Peter & Repeater.
again twins & named Max & Climax.
Again d same. disgusted Sardar named them TIRED & RETIRED!
19. SARDARS WENT 4A FILM.
ON ASKING THEM Y THEY CAME IN A BIG GROUP OF 19?
THEY REPLIED THAT THE FILM WAS ONLY FOR ABOVE 18...
20.A sardharji photographer focusing a dead body's face in a funeral function, suddenly all relatives beat him why?
He said "SMILE PLEASE"
21.Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence into future tense.
Sardar: The future tense is "u will go to jail".
22.Sardar gets ready ,wears tie, coat ,goes out, climbs tree, sits on the branch regularly.
A man asks why he does this.
Sardar:"I've been promoted as branch manager."
23.Sardarji standing below a tube light with a open mouth.................
Because his doctor advised him "Todays dinner should be light"
24.Sardarji was filling up application form for a job. He was not sure as to what to be filled in column "Salary Expected".
After much thought he wrote : Yes!
25.SARDAR & FAMILY GO 2 A PARTY.
HE INTRODUCES HIMSELF - I SARDAR, SHE SARDARNEE, THE BOY MY KID & THE GIRL MY KIDNEY....
26.One sardarji professor asked a plumber to come to his college.
U knw Why?
Because he wanted to check where the question paper is leaking...
27.Sardar told his servant: Go and water the plants.
Servant: It"s already raining.
Sardar: So what take an umbrella and go.
28.Santa! Your daughter has died!
Depressed, Sardar jumps from 100th floor.
At 50th floor he remembers- I don't have a daughter!
At 25flr:I'm unmarried!
At 10flr:I'm Banta not santa
29.Sardar found the answer to the most difficult question ever -
What will come first, Chicken or egg?
O Yaar, what ever u order first will come first.
30.A dog was chasing a Sardar and the Sardar was laughing.
A bystander: why are u laughing?
Sardar: I have a Air cell phone but still hutch network is following me.
31.Sardar wins 20 cr from Rs. 20 lottery ticket.
Dealer gave 11 cr after deducting tax.
Angry Sardar: "Give me 20 cr or else return my 20 Rs back.!
32.A teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket match.
All were busy writing except one Sardarji.
He wrote "DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH!"
33.Postman:- I Have To Come 5 Miles To Deliver U This Packet.
Sardar:- why did u come so far. Instead u could have posted it....
34. What does a sardar do after taking a xerox?
He will compare it with the original for any spelling mistakes.
35.Sardar proposed a Girl......
Girl said 'I'm 1yr elder to you'...........
Sardar said 'Oye No Problem Soniye,I'll marry you NEXT YEAR.
36.WHY CANT SARDARS DIAL NINE-ELEVEN (911) AT EMERGENCY?
THEY CAN NOT FIND THE ELEVEN ON THE PHONE.
37.Sardar & his wife buy coffee in a shop.
Sardar says... Drink quickly......
Wife asks why...
sardar says hot coffee Rs5 and cold coffee Rs10.
38.A Sardar & his wife filed an application 4 Divorce.
Judge asked: How'll U divide, U"VE 3 children?
Sardar replied: Ok! We"ll apply NEXT YEAR.
39.Sardar's wish : when i die,i wana die like my grandpa who died peacefuly in his sleep not screaming like all d passengers in d car he was driving..
40.Sardar at an Art Gallery: I suppose this horrible looking thing is what you call modern art ?
Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, thats a mirror!
41.Sardar was writing something very slowly.
Friend asked:" Why r u writing so slowly?
Sardar: "I'm writing 2 my 6 yr old son, he can't read very fast.
42.Sardar news: A 2 seater plane crashed in a graveyard in Punjab . Local sardars have so far found 500 bodies and are still digging for more..
43.A man asked sardarji, why Manmohan singh goes walking at evening not in the morning. Sardarji replied "Arey bhai Manmohan is PM not AM".
44.Sardar visits Chinese friend dying in hospital. Man says CHIN YU YAN n dies.
Srdr goes2 china 2 find meaning of friends last words.
It is 'U R STANDNG ON OXYGEN TUBE!"
45.Sardarji was standing in front of the mirror with his eyes closed. His wife asked what you are doing ?
He said-im seeing how I look while sleeping.