My SCRAPBOOK (సేకరణలు): A COLLECTION of articles in English and Telugu(తెలుగు), from various sources, on varied subjects. I do not claim credit for any of the contents of these postings as my own.A student's declaration made at the end of his answer paper, holds good to the articles here too:"I hereby declare that the answers written above are true to the best of my friend's knowledge and I claim no responsibility whatsoever of the correctness of the answers."

Sunday, November 22, 2009

ME and MY BOSS


When I Take a long time to finish,
I am slow,
When my boss takes a long time,
he is thorough

When I don't do it,
I am lazy,
When my boss does not do it,
he is busy,

When I do something without being told,
I am trying to be smart,
When my boss does the same,
he takes the initiative,

When I please my boss,
I am apple polishing,
When my boss pleases his boss,
He is cooperating,

When I make a mistake,
I' am an idiot.
When my boss makes a mistake,
He's only human.

When I am out of the office,
I am wondering around.
When my boss is out of the office,
He's on business.

When I am on a day off sick,
I am always sick.
When my boss is a day off sick,
He must be very ill.

When I apply for leave,
I must be going for an interview.
When my boss applies for leave,
it's because he's overworked

When I do good,
my boss never remembers,
When I do wrong,
he never forgets

what to do?????????????

(An email forward)
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SOCIALISM HOW IT WORKS & WHY IT DOES NOT WORK!

"You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it"- Adrian Rogers

An economics professor at a local college made a statement that he had never failed a single student before, but had once failed an entire class.


That class had insisted that socialism worked and that no one would be poor and no one would be rich, a great equalizer.


The professor then said, "OK, we will have an experiment in this class on this plan".
All grades would be averaged and everyone would receive the same grade so no one would fail and no one would receive an A.


After the first test, the grades were averaged and everyone got a B.
The students who studied hard were upset and the students who studied little were happy.


As the second test rolled around, the students who studied little had studied even less and the ones who studied hard decided they wanted a free ride too so they studied little.
The second test average was a D! No one was happy.


When the 3rd test rolled around, the average was an F.
The scores never increased as bickering, blame and name-calling all resulted in hard feelings and no one would study for the benefit of anyone else.


All failed, to their great surprise, and the professor told them that:

- Socialism would also ultimately fail because when the reward is great, the effort to succeed is great.

- But when government takes all the reward away, no one will try or want to succeed.

(An email forward)

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Are you really feel qualified ?

Never underestimate kids

A stranger was seated next to a little girl on the airplane when the stranger turned to her and said, 'Let's talk. I've heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger..'

The little girl, who had just opened her book, closed it slowly and said to the stranger, 'What would you like to talk about?'

'Oh, I don't know,' said the stranger. 'How about nuclear power?' and he smiles.

'OK, ' she said. 'That could be an interesting topic. But let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff ? grass -Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?'

The stranger, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence, thinks about it and says, 'Hmmm, I have no idea.'

To which the little girl replies, 'Do you really feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don't know shit?

(An email forward)
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